Scratch that -- being HUMAN, and an imperfect one at that, I have my issues. I suppose issues aren't solely feminine domain... but, being a woman, I feel qualified to speak only to more feminine issues. Thus, this blog will be dedicated to just that.
There are men who decided to try reading this who are, at this moment, frozen - with horrific thoughts of maxi-pads and lip balm parading in their heads. The shock! The horror! But no, I won't be speaking of the latest fashions, or discussing which brand of tampon will bring the longest lasting comfort (the sad fact is that no tampon can bring "comfort" during that horrible process). So no... these are not the issues at hand.
We're talking insecurities of all shapes and sizes. Depression anyone? How about marriage issues? Motherhood! Life is full of complex problems... and there is only one place to go for answers. Jesus Christ. (Yes, I sense some head shaking... maybe some eye rolling...)
My most recent epiphany is that I am loved. Loved, absolutely - based on no merit of mine. I don't have to bend over backwards trying to be something in particular in order to earn the favor of God. He loves me already. I'm His. (Seriously, how cool is THAT?) When I make a mistake, I don't have to do penance... I just have to get up and try again.
I have spent most of my life living in fear and worry. Fear that if I'm not good enough, my husband won't love me anymore. Fear that if I don't act exactly right, I'll make God mad at me. Fear that my relationship with my kids, and my daughter in particular, will deteriorate and we'll spend her teen years fighting. (Isn't that what normally happens? But I want to be different!)
But the fear and the worry -- not necessary. The insecurities... the thoughts that I'm just not good enough... the idea that I have to be the prettiest or the best in order to keep my husband's attention... the idea that my daughter is naturally going to learn to hate me because I'm so obnoxious (who would have thought it, right?)... All those thoughts can be replaced with new thoughts. No more listening to lies for me...
I'll take it one day at a time...
